The past few weeks have been troublesome. A constant scratching on my thigh as my keys pushed though the pocket wall of my work trousers. The temporary fix of micro-pore tape had worked for the last time as the fibres parted ways never to join again.

Today however things were different, a new pair of trousers that had been on standby were put into action. I slid my legs in and hoisted up the black cotton work-wear. Next the moment of truth as the attempt was made to locate button in hole, success the fabric had made it round my middle. I took a few seconds to enjoy the snug fit before selecting the days shirt from the hanger.

The morning routine was proceeding as normal when the time came to place my phone, keys and wallet in their usual pocket slots. I slid my wallet into my pocket as I felt the fabric tighten slightly, my phone and keys took up residence on the other side, their entry too resulting in a snugger fit than before. I looked down to realise what had been a nice fitting pair of trousers had suddenly grown ears bulging outwards. Unable to resolve the predicament I continued on to work in the knowledge that a passer by might quite easily think I was smuggling a Cornish pasty in each pocket.

I now reach the point of this post. Why on earth style a pair of men’s trousers with pockets when they are absolutely no use at all to put things in? A few pence of fabric may have been saved increasing the profit margin for the manufacturer; fine do that, but let me pay the few pence extra to have working pockets instead of being one unzip away from an elephant impression.