Today the knife entered my flesh

I was down, I don't like my fat self. I didn't want to eat butI needed to. Something healthy I decided. I took an onion and slowly undressed it until its pale skin was fully visible. The knife shone with silvery brilliance, its blade razor sharp. I knew it was wrong when the blade pierced the delicate skin, a shot of pain from my hand. Quickly the tools were removed from the operation. I had a puncture wound, the tip of the knife had slid into my finger. I watched as the blood rushed to fill the gap. Lucky I was that the cut was a clean one. It sealed up quickly thanks to my fast regenerative cycle. The knife came up again this time the onion had had it. Within minutes its pale body was in pieces. I could hear the call now,"MURDERER!!!" I needed to rid myself of the evidence, quickly. I plunged the fleshy pieces into hot oil, crackling and burning. Complimenting it with bacon, peas and cracked pepper, they would never know. I consumed the evidence, they were not going to find me guilty.

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3 Replies to “Today the knife entered my flesh”

  1. Until you go for a shit tomorrow and the evidence is there for all to see…

    By the way, why do you always have peanuts/Sweetcorn in your shit? i dont even like sweetcorn 😮

  2. Really? well how do they get them then? coz when i have a poo, i dont take the “seeds” out :confused: do they goto a big “sweetcorn-seed-getting-out-of-poo place” ?

    Well… every days a school day, except for the weekends of course.

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